A girl with too many thoughts...

Friday, 1 July 2016

Comparing Yourself to Others

Comparing myself to everybody around me and feeling inferior is something I still really struggle with. To me, it seems like all of my friends have everything in their life sorted. They get good grades, have passed their driving test, have a part-time job - all whilst taking part in numerous other activities and hobbies on the side. Of course, I am happy for them when they achieve something (like passing their driving test), but it always leaves me feeling rubbish about myself (sounds selfish, I know).

Throughout my childhood, I don't really think I've ever felt quite good enough, and this is something that is becoming more apparent to me the older I get and the more I have to do or the more I should be achieving, which I am not.

At the age of 18, I feel like I am expected to be earning my own money, already driving, getting top grades, going to a top university and being completely independent. For obvious reasons, all of this hasn't been my main focus over the last 2 years and now I look at my friends and realise how far behind I am, how immature I am compared to them.

I feel guilty because I tell myself I don't have any real reason to not have achieved these things. I've just been really lazy, right? or I'm just using my mental health conditions as an excuse. But this just isn't true. Suffering from a mental health condition is a perfectly valid reason to not be able to do something at a particular point in your life, you are not using your illness as an excuse. The most important thing should always be focusing on your health before anything else, including your mental health.

I hate to use a cliché analogy that you have probably heard 100 times, but you wouldn't expect somebody who has just broken their leg to run a marathon in 6 weeks time. Just like you shouldn't expect yourself to have done everything on the face of the earth when you have been struggling with a mental health condition. Everybody must go at things at their own pace and if you aren't ready to do something, that is okay, there is going to be plenty of opportunity when you are feeling well again.

And remember, it may seem like those around you have it all figured out, but trust me, they probably don't.

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